Porcelain Doll

I can’t see a thing
Will I wake up from this dream?
I scream inside myself
As I draw imaginary lines
Living in my made up world
My makeup’s real
I blame the stairs
But I keep falling
into the hands of lies

Sleeping deep
All my dreams I keep
locked up so deep inside
Where’s the light in my eyes?

Where did I go?
Where will I find myself?
I hear my echo
Uncover my eyes

The blades of my truth
These lines on my face
Losing myself in all I can’t erase
Lost in my silent cry
I taste one last tear before I die

Staring in the mirror
Like a porcelain doll
My hair falls softly
But only to cover up…
Endless mockery
All that’s left of what I see
I don’t fight reality
Too numb to feel
I draw this imaginary line

Holing my last breath
inside my silent screams
Wrapped in artificial light
I’m freighted…
Frozen…

The wide eyed and innocent girl
in my imaginary world
Is six feet under
fighting for breath
What lingers in the doorway?
Haunting shadows
The voices never fade away…

Find me at the crime scene
where I’ve made it all a dream
Yet too real to escape the proof

Is this my only truth?

I’m frozen here inside
the safety I create
Destructive path to emptiness
I stare into the nothingness

Like a porcelain doll…
~Janie Davel